Friday, April 6, 2012

Autism Island: 50 things you should not say to autism parents.

Autism Island: 50 things you should not say to autism parents.: I wrote this post for two different people: autism parents, and the people we interact with.  If you are an autism parent I hope...

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Autism’s UGLY side

It’s not often that the A word rears its ugly head as badly as it did yesterday.  THANK GOD FOR THAT!  Yesterday, Matthew was completely out of control!  He refused to get out of bed to start…that should’ve let me know what kind of day it was going to be…then I got 3…yes 3, e-mails from his teacher in less than an hour.  He failed his Science test and didn’t do his English homework at all.  (Okay, not that big of a deal…he just retakes the test and gets detention for English…)  It gets worse…At lunchtime, as his class was walking into the cafeteria, he saw Scott.  For no reason that anyone who witnessed it could discern, Matthew walked up to Scott, punched him in the arm and flicked his ear.  (Scott’s arm is still sore tonight.)  Finally, he was doodling in his Math workbook instead of working so his teacher got onto him.  What did he do?  He utterly DESTROYED his Math workbook to the point of no return.  Yep…got to get him a new one ordered—you read that correctly---they have to ORDER him a new one.  *sigh*  Is that it?  Not yet!  When she asked him why he did that, he then started yelling and throwing stuff around the classroom. 

Have I mentioned I believe his teacher is an absolute SAINT????

I do not know why he does this kind of stuff, but I do wish he didn’t.  I’ve had people tell me it’s because we don’t discipline him enough or the right way.  I’ve also had people tell me,”if he were MY kid, he wouldn’t do that!”  (These statements are from people who work with kids every day—kind of scary, huh?)  When he runs off in public, they’ll say stuff under their breath, thinking we can’t hear them, like “what kind of parents are they anyway to just let him do that?”  Seriously?  Do they think we WANT to chase him and try to find him when the sensory overload gets to be too much?  Do they think it’s fun to see everyone of his peers get invited for sleepovers & birthday parties & not him?  Do they really think he’s not noticing this?  HE DOES!  I DO!  His Brother does….he’s not invisible…just different.  Autism is not contagious!  Your kids won’t “catch” it from him.  They may even be better off if they know him!  It’ll make them more compassionate & aware of the fact that just because someone thinks differently than they do—it doesn’t mean they can’t be your friend!   Do these people think it’s fun for Scott to have an Autistic brother?  Unfortunately, Scott gets the brunt of Matthew’s aggression.  Jason & I stop it when we can, but it is impossible for us to be around ALL the time.  We can’t afford it financially for one of us to quit and stay home with them.  We tried that for 2 years & it isn’t feasible at this time.  He doesn’t qualify for Social Security because of our income, but if I quit work to take care of him, the Social Security he would get wouldn’t be as much as I make—kind of hard to justify that, huh?  Money isn’t everything, but it is essential if you want to live in a halfway decent part of town.

Then there’s the part of me that worries about what would happen to him if something happens to me or Jason.  I know one of our family members would take him and they would try their best, but they don’t understand what Autism is and how if affects our daily lives.  They get to see bits & pieces when they’re around, but unless you’re around it 24/7, you just CAN’T “get it”!  I don’t want Scott to feel obligated to take care of Matthew, so we encourage Scott to have as many interests as he can that are separate from Matthew. 


Sorry if this has turned into a rant, but I just got to let it go sometimes or I feel like I’m going to explode. 


Peace and love to all!


Sunday, April 1, 2012

Palm Sunday

What did you and your family do for Palm Sunday?  Did you worship the Lord?  It’s a great time to do so!  This is the time of the year when Christians all over the world celebrate Easter.  We do not celebrate Jesus’ death so much as His resurrection and his triumph over death and sin.  Why is it called Palm Sunday?  Here’s the Biblical Reference from the book of John—chapter 12:  On the next day much people that were come to the feast, when they heard that Jesus was coming to Jerusalem, 13Took branches of palm trees, and went forth to meet him, and cried, Hosanna: Blessed is the King of Israel that cometh in the name of the Lord.   I’m no preacher, but Palm Sunday was 6 days before the Passover feast in Israel.  Jesus was crucified the day before Passover and rose 3 days later.  This rising from the dead is what we’ve come to celebrate as Easter.  It’s not about eggs and candy.  It’s a celebration of being free from the curse of death that was laid on us when Adam and Eve were cast out of the Garden of Eden.  Jesus offered himself willingly as a sacrifice so that we as unholy creatures can approach and be with the Most High Holy God.  I attended Sunday School with Matthew today as we’re still working on getting Omri used to going to church.  In his Middle School Youth class, they talked about the Parable of the Wedding Feast in the book of Matthew in The Bible.  “Many are invited, but few will enter.”  I believe this is a reference to the fact that God desires all of us to accept Jesus as His Son and our Savior, but not all of us will come to him and accept Him as Savior AND Lord.  Do we live our lives everyday to reflect this or are we caught up in petty spats at work?  Do we willingly share with others what God has done in our lives or are we too afraid of being ridiculed and cast out?  These are tough questions and ones I struggle with every day.  I’m not perfect, Lord knows, and it’s only by HIS Grace that I can approach God’s throne with confidence that He hears my prayers.  Do you have this same confidence?  If not, I encourage you to accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior and find a good Bible believing/Bible teaching church in your area.  Sometimes you will need to visit several before you find one that feels like “home”.    How do you accept Jesus as Lord and Savior?  It’s as easy as A, B, C.  Accept Jesus is God’s Son and that He came down from Heaven to die for your sins.  Believe that He died for your sins, rose again, and is in Heaven preparing a place for you. Confess that Jesus is Lord and Savior.  Although this blog is more about family than a Christian outreach, I feel that I would not be fulfilling my responsibility to spread the Good News if I didn’t offer up this opportunity for everyone who reads it to accept Jesus. 

As far as our Wonder Dog, Service Dog, Omri goes, he is doing GREAT!  He went with us Friday night to Texas Roadhouse.  I had a Steak Kabob, Jason had Steak and Ribs, and the boys had Ribs.  Omri did really well!  His little nose was working overtime heading into the restaurant, but he went right in and went into an “under” at our table.  He got up only once…when the servers started clapping and dancing to celebrate another customer’s birthday.  All he did then was stand up under the table and look at Jason.  Jason told him it was ok, and Omri just laid back down.  As we left, we got a lot of stares and I could hear people saying, “I didn’t realize there was a dog in here.”  That is the GREATEST compliment we could get when he’s with us.  Smile    He did well at church this morning, too.  He laid down in Sunday School for about 30 minutes, then he started whimpering so I took him to “potty”.  When we got back in, he laid back down and chilled out til we finished.

It’s been a rough week for Scott.  I received a phone call from school on Monday saying he was complaining of a tummy ache.  When I went to pick him up, he was pale and sweaty.  I asked where he hurt, and he pointed right over the spot where his appendix lives so as a precaution, we took a trip to the ER at the new Children’s Hospital.  Thankfully, it wasn’t that, but dehydration so we got to go home after about 7 hours.  He did have an ultrasound AND a CT Scan just to be sure because of how tender he was.  Then on Friday, when I took him for his allergy shots, the second one stung so much he had tears!  Next, I think Scott broke his little toe yesterday before his soccer game.  He was walking back into the living room from the kitchen and caught the corner of the coffee table.  I thought he’d just stubbed it at first, but once he calmed down, he told me that the corner of the table had caught between his 2 littlest toes and pulled them apart.  It looks pretty bad…swollen and bruised.  He still played in his soccer game, though.  He played goalie for about half of the first half and then he played mid-fielder for about half of the second half.  He said that while he was playing it didn’t hurt.  He has been wearing flip flops around the house instead of his shoes to try to keep the pressure off of it. 

Matthew is working hard in school trying to get caught up so he doesn’t have to go to summer school this June.  He really wants to go to Boy Scout camp, and it’s the same time as summer school so he’s been working hard to be able to go to Boy Scout camp!  Open-mouthed smile  It’s kind of fun to have something like that to motivate him to do better.  Today, after church, I went to Wal~Mart grocery shopping and bought some cacti and some other little plants to go in our flower bed in the front of our duplex.  Matthew and Scott helped us with that.   I will post pics after the camera battery charges up a little.